What to Do When it All Goes to Pieces
It happens to us all.
We have ‘one of those weeks.’
Where the seemingly stable ground is whipped from beneath us and before we know it we’re freefalling through uncertainty.
I don’t know about you, but it always seems to sneak up on me when I’m not looking. It’s usually when things are going great, everything’s amazing and life is just flowing.
And then out of nowhere.
Something happens that changes everything.
And we go into meltdown.
The self-doubt appears.
The ‘what ifs’ rear their ugly heads.
And we’re left questioning.
Why me? Why now? Just why?
I had one of these weeks last week.
I’m mid-way through planning my wedding.
The invites have gone out.
The dress is being made.
I’ve spent hours and hours and hours planning.
And then out of nowhere I was thrown a huge curve ball.
The wedding venue fell through.
Aha! It got me.
There it was staring me right between the eyes:
The beast of uncertainty!
It had sneaked in the back door when I wasn’t looking.
Just what is it about uncertainty that makes us humans lose our tiny minds?
Why do we crave the comfort of knowing?
It’s true though isn’t it?
Think about it for a moment.
Cast your mind back to the last time you felt wobbly, like things weren’t going great.
I’ll bet there was some level of uncertainty being faced.
Am I right?
One of my favourite teachers (Mastin from the Daily Love) once said something very profound that I’ve always remembered and it’s this:
“The quality of your life is in direct proportion to the amount of uncertainty you can handle.”
Think about it.
What’s your relationship like with uncertainty?
Do you do everything in your power to avoid it?
Or do you constantly push yourself to face new levels of uncertainty?
The answer holds the key to your success in life.
Here’s another quote from Mastin on uncertainty…
“Your relationship with uncertainty is a measure of how successful you will become. If you are addicted to comfort, addicted to control, addicted to certainty – then you can surely count on your life to shrivel up and die a slow and boring death.”
It’s a scary prospect, but it’s true.
The sooner we get used to uncertainty, the more great things we’ll achieve in life.
So just how do you come to terms with uncertainty?
Well we must start with acceptance.
The only thing we can be certain of is uncertainty (well and death…but that’s just morbid).
So it’s here.
We have to deal with it.
Or shrivel up and die.
Which option is worse?
Once we accept that uncertainty is a natural part of life, then we can choose to view it in a different light.
We can choose to view it in a way that empowers us.
And this is where I got to last week when I was faced with massive uncertainty.
Well actually, If I’m honest I allowed myself to have a few days of major resistance….(some ‘woe is me’ time) and then I pulled myself together.
What if we could view uncertainty as a positive thing?
What if we could embrace uncertainty and actively enjoy it?
Imagine how much easier life would be
I’m slowly training myself to do this.
I said slowly.
It’s taking a while!
And sometimes I find that all it takes is an inspiring quote form someone else who’s been there to make the shift.
This is the quote that did it for me:
“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing!” Helen Keller.
It’s true right?
Who wants to live a certain life?
Where would the adventure be then?
In-fact how boring would life be if we knew everything that was about to happen?
Where would the element of magic & surprise be?
I can’t think of anything worse can you?
And furthermore, are we ever really and truly safe?
I think not.
We’ve been lying to ourselves for all these years.
We may feel safe in the knowledge of certainty, the ‘better the devil you know’, but is this really true?
How safe is it to stay so far in our comfort zone that we shrivel up and die?
As Helen Keller said:
“Security is mostly a superstition. Avoiding danger is no safer in the long run than outright exposure.”
So I have a proposition for you.
Do you care to join me on the daring adventure of life?!
Leave comfort behind.
Wave certainty goodbye.
And next time it goes to pieces, maybe, just maybe that’s the safest place to be.
Simple Life Strategy: How to deal with uncertainty
1. Accept that uncertainty is a natural part of life
2. Choose to view uncertainty in a more empowering way
3. Consider the alternative to uncertainty – do we want to shrivel up & die for a life of comfort?
4. Think about how safe it really is in the long run to stay in your comfort zone?
5. Choose to view uncertainty as a daring adventure filled with magic & surprises!!
Tell me – what are your thoughts on uncertainty? I’d love to know. Leave a comment below.
Thanks for listening.